The Independent Student Newspaper of Northern Kentucky University.

The Northerner

The Independent Student Newspaper of Northern Kentucky University.

The Northerner

The Independent Student Newspaper of Northern Kentucky University.

The Northerner

NKU love stories

Professors, alumni and students talk romance in light of Valentine’s Day

Nancy and Dr. Thomas Bowers

Within NKU’s English department, there is a unique dynamic between two professors. 

Dr. Thomas and Nancy Bowers don’t share a last name by coincidence. The husband and wife duo are loved by many students and known for their generosity and genuine interest in the well-being of those in their classroom. 

Inside Nancy’s Landrum Academic Center office, with soft classical music pouring from the radio, the spouses sat down with The Northerner and told their story: from how they found one another to how NKU found them. 

Sitting in a feminism class in Iowa State University, some 600 miles from NKU, Thomas and Nancy sparked one another’s interest. Thomas was pursuing his doctorate degree, but unlike some of his peers, he was noticeably intelligent, funny and sociable, Nancy said.

“From my standpoint, it was just this kindness,” Thomas said about Nancy, who was pursuing her master’s degree at the same time. 

The duo began hanging out with groups of other Iowa State students, keeping themselves occupied at the pool hall, campus bowling alley, local parks or race car events. As the days passed, Thomas and Nancy kept spending more and more time together. They began dating and got married three years later in 2005. 

As Thomas finished his doctorate degree, he began the job search adventure. Keeping opportunities for his wife in mind, he interviewed at NKU. The couple felt that the region was a perfect compromise. Thomas, who grew up in Cleveland, felt comfortable with the area, and he also believed it was plenty big enough for Nancy, who was from a small town of around 20,000.

Six months after Thomas began his career at NKU in 2005, Nancy was offered a part-time position at the university. She started out teaching speech in the communications department, then advanced to the English department with Thomas. 

Before long, the two had merged together into the English department, with faculty offices right next door to one another. The couple reminisced on days when they would exchange secret codes by knocking on their office walls. (They have since moved into offices that are a hallway apart.)

When students find out that the Bowers professors are married, they give reactions varying from “Really?!” to “Oh, they’re awesome!”

“For some of the students when they have both of us the same term I tell them, ‘Well you were lucky…you got Bowerized this year.’ There was one that had [Thomas] twice and me once in one semester,” Nancy explained.

The couple thrives on teaching classes about technical writing, business and web writing and rhetoric. They enjoy the variety of majors and colleges that are represented in their classrooms, ranging from computer information technology to accounting to healthcare. Both mentioned they love fostering students to take what they learn in the classroom and put their own creative spin on assignments that would typically seem mundane, like academic papers. 

Being married to another professor can come with its challenges and opportunities. “I have immediate access to a support system,” Thomas said. “It can be challenging on the other end because—where’s that healthy separation? We do, every once in a while, say, ‘Okay, I have one more thing to say about school and then we’re done.”

When the Bowers are not in Landrum Academic Center, they can be found strolling around campus: Loch Norse is one of Thomas’ favorite spots. 

Finding little ways to make Valentine’s Day special is important to the couple. Whether it is going out for an ice cream treat, a candle-lit dinner prepared by Thomas or simply hanging out with their dog Sandy.

Shreya and Arnav

From all the way across the world and from friends to lovers, two international students found their hearts’ desires in Northern Kentucky.

Sophomore Shreya Thapa and junior Arnav Shah are both from Nepal—actually only 30 minutes away from one another in their home country. But it took a journey across the world to find each other. 

“We met on the very first day we landed in the U.S., actually, and we have been together ever since,” said Shah. It was January 2022 and Shah landed in Kentucky in the evening, and Thapa touched down the next morning. 

As is customary for new NKU international students, the duo found themselves in the University Center ballroom for immigration check-in. “It was a room full of men, and the only seat left was at his table,” Thapa explained. 

Being one thousand miles away from home for the first time, the couple said they found a home in each other. “For me, it always felt like home whenever we were together,” Shah said. 

But the relationship began as just a friendship. In fact, Thapa said she thought they would never really date. 

All that changed when Thapa left for California in the summer of 2022 and Shah stayed back in Kentucky. Shah said he spent most of the summer talking about his crush to his roommates and waiting for her to return. “That’s when I realized I was in love,” Shah said. “When she came back from California that’s when I made a move and how we ended up together.”

Friends of the couple were ecstatic, since they had been rooting for them to end up together since day one, Thapa said. When she posted a photo of Shah on Instagram, her friends went into a tizzy, claiming they all knew it was going to happen. 

The couple loves spending their time going to concerts, strolling in Washington or Devou Park, going out for boba tea and cooking Nepalese dumplings called momos. 

Something Thapa appreciates about her relationship, especially as an international student, is having someone to feel safe around and to depend on. “Every time I deal with something, I can not have my parents around me. So it’s really nice to know that in two minutes, if you call them, they will be here and they’ll take care of you,” Thapa said. 

College life comes with lots of commitments and responsibilities, though, which can be difficult for a new relationship. Even though the couple lives a couple blocks apart, there can be consecutive days where they don’t see each other because of work and studying. 

They will, however, be sure to spend time together this Valentine’s Day. Shah guaranteed that he had a worthy surprise up his sleeves, grinning as Thapa said she can’t wait to celebrate. 

 

Ray and Lin

For two NKU alumni, the university will hold a special place in their heart in more ways than one. 

It was the fall of 2019. Ray Archer and Lin Dames were in two different sections of the same biology class, which they admittedly weren’t doing too well in. In fact, their difficulties with the class actually helped them bond. “The first thing he texted me was the toad sweating meme asking about the lab for biology,” Dames recalled. “I had to say, ‘Sorry man, I dropped out.’”

It turned out the two ran in some of the same college circles, mostly the theater circle. It was an interaction in the School of the Arts that actually goes down in infamy between the couple. As Archer and Dames were catching up after a rehearsal, Dames jokingly referred to Archer as her husband. “And then the next day he told everybody he was going to marry me,” she laughed.

It turned out that Archer was right in his determination, as the couple got engaged in April 2023.

The hang-outs and flirtatiousness paid off well for Archer, especially when he showed up to one of Dame’s shows at the School of the Arts…then showed up the next day…and the next.  

“Then we kissed in the Applebee’s parking lot, and then the rest was history,” Dames said.

The couple officially began dating nearly one month before COVID-19 hit, Archer said. As it turned out, COVID flipped their world upside down, but one might say for the better. When Dames’ dorm was shut down, they made the spontaneous decision to move in together at Archer’s apartment. 

Being isolated together turned out to be a good thing for the couple, as they grew closer and found ways to make the quarantine special. Hammocking in the green space on campus was a common occurrence for the two, along with social-distance picnics with friends from inside their cars. 

One thing the duo had to adjust to was the amount of time they spent together. “If we can handle that, there are no boring days now,” Archer said. It was easy for their individual identities to sort of merge together. “It was always Ray and Lin and sometimes I wished I was my own person,” Dames reflected. In the end, though, they were glad that their lives worked together in tandem and that they could play such a large part in each other’s lives. 

As time went on, the couple said they grew up together. Sitting on the same row at their fall 2022 commencement ceremony, they reflected on sharing such an important moment together. “It worked for us because it put us on the same timeline and our goals lined up really easily,” Archer said. “There was never a point where it was like, ‘I don’t know what I’m going to do without you on campus next year.’”

Now, the future is full of wedding plans and moves toward the future, as Archer and Dames hope to say “I do” in 2025. They have also both applied for graduate school and hope to start working on their next degree soon.

While they’re not wedding planning, the two will take time to celebrate their anniversary and Valentine’s Day, which both come together in mid-February. It’s important to be intentional and keep dating, Archer said, doing things like going out for ice cream or trying their hand at making chocolate-covered strawberries. And of course making a nostalgic trip back to Applebee’s.